John: Oh, my God! Nancy Pelosi!

What an ugly sight to see!

You're by far the dumbest Liberal out there, definately!

I'm a better Speaker of the House than you'll ever be!

Not to mention my I.Q. level is higher than three!

Every time I hear you, I just want to rant!

Can you say you've even read the Affordable Care Act? Hell, no you can't!

I control the house now, your time has passed!

And your remaining time as a politician won't last.

Nancy: You say I don't know what I'm doing, but I sure do.

Now, sit down and shut it, John, 'cause I'm about to school you.

You're a bad boy, John. You're not very honest.

You really should spend less time handing out money from lobbyists.

On the House floor, no less. There's some real class.

With you as speaker, nothing in congress will pass.

Compared to me, you're nothing but a runt.

Every time you try to go after me, it's just a political witch hunt.

John: A witch hunt, you say? Oh, that's rich.

Just listening to your stupidity makes my skin itch.

News flash! The Catholic Church is against contraception!

Saying otherwise isn't just deception,

It's blantant stupidity!

And it's going to be stopped by yours truly!

And extending welfare benefits won't make more jobs, you dumb bat!

You don't deserve to be a politician, you should just be Congress' doormat.

Oh, and one more thing, Nancy, just before I go:

Why are so afraid to go on a FOX News show?

Nancy: 98% of Catholic women use contraceptives, indeed.

And more welfare benefits are just what we need!

And for your information, I'm not a dumb bat.

I think it was obvious Romney wouldn't win -- everyone knew that.

Here's something that doesn't click in theat brain of coal:

Obamacare actually furthers the founding fathers' goals!

It's a really great act.

And, honey, that's a fact.

At least, that's what I believe.

Time for me to take my leave.

And I wouldn't get too cocky, 'cause at you right now the Republicans are pretty peeved.


  • Who won? Tell me in a comment and the winner will be announced in the next battle.
  • Winner of the previous battle: BILL MAHER
  • Next Battle: Rush Limbaugh VS. Ed Schultz

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